Jealous

I easily got jealous with my oldest sister.

Due to some reasons abah usually
listen to anything that come out of her mouth
better than what i say.
Am I speaking nonsense or
because she always has the so called
"idea yang bernas" abah?

I also got jealous because she is confident
in everything.
For example, I really hate it when I have to go
to the bank because that means I need to speak
to the bank's officer.
Its kind of uncomfortable for me to speak
to strangers.
It feels like that I have thousands of butterflies
in my stomach that even the HCl can't afford to
kill all of them.
But I think things are better now.
I don't feel really nervous or burdened
to speak to stranger thanks to her.
I mean, how long you gonna depend on someone
else when you actually can do it by yourself.
The only thing that you need is "courage".

I don't know why I'm writing this random post
about you sis. Haha.
Maybe because I miss you.
I miss everybody at home.