Are you okay?

Some people asked me this question quite a lot this past few days,
which is...

So here are some of my answers :

1. OK. (muka ketat)
this kind of okay means i'm NOT okay at all. i need time on my own

so just stay away from me for a while

or i'll cry like crazy in front of you. (manja!)

2. OK. (muka senyum x ikhlas)

it means im not so okay to talk to you but yeah thanks for asking.

3. OK...KOT

it means im still fighting against myself to not to be sad anymore
but not sure whether im succeed or not.

4. OK JE...DON'T WORRY :)

this okay means im good.

i can handle my feeling well and yes! thanks for asking.

5. :)
i dunno how to answer you..will you accept my

not-so-ikhlas-senyum-actually 

(cuz im still grieving <--mcm ada org mati pulak)

note 1 : thanks cik anis sbb rajin bertanya.. i lapt u :)

Salah sangka

You had misunderstood me..big time!
Its hard i guess to understand me.
I need  something else.
But since nobody ever ask
then i dont think its necessary to tell
cuz i dont think you wanna know.
Dang!

make me strong!

Somebody do care

Grateful to know that somebody do care.
At least i have someone i can always rely on.
No matter it is day or night.
Whether its sunny or rain.
There's no other thing i would ask in this world
other than God's blessing towards you.
-->umi, abah and my family

Such a horrible daughter i am
always being the black-sheep in the family.
The one that make you worry the most.
You said that its okay..but who knows
deep inside we're sharing the same pain.

Im sorry cuz i might not be able to fulfill
my promise towards you.

Its not that i'm giving up.
Its just that i'm not as strong as you.
I'm fragile.
I always need someone beside me
even for the slightest thing to do.


note 1 : i have heart to be mend..anyone?

Its tomorrow

Esok Khamis.
Mungkin hari ni hari last boleh bergurau senda
sebab esok maybe dah boleh tahu result exam semalam.

Orang duk pesan suh doa banyak-banyak.
So what i pray is.. i hope that Allah grant the prayers made by you.
Yes you! the one that pray for me.

If what im doing now is something beneficial for my life
in this dunya and hereafter, i pray that He'll ease my path.
But if something bad happen,
i hope that im strong enough to face it.
I need to be really really strong.


note 1 : mana janji-janji manis nak jadi optimis ni?? *dush2*

Rant #3

The clueless me is going to have
an exam on this 20th of Dec.

Thinking too much about the same thing
for a long period of time is something yang
menyerabutkan otak yang dah sedia ada serabai
dan berselirat dengan macam-macam hal ni.
KOMPLEKS!
Life and trouble come in one package.

Should train myself to be more positive
and optimist in everything i do.
=.='
Moje sdrce, sila bertabah!

Should I?

Kalau ikut kata benz,
"we should start the day with something sweet and end with something sweeter."
But if i start the day with something bad, should i end with something bitter?

The thing is, kalau kita duk depend kat manusia
memang tak akan satisfied sampai bila-bila.
That's why la kawan matluthfi cakap kita kena bergantung pada Yg Tidak Mati
sbb once dah letakkan pergantungan pada yang Esa
insyaallah He Wont let us down kan?

Sorry to say but you had disappointed me.
Big time.
It's okay then since it's not the first time after all.
I'm used to be ignored by people anyway.
Many times.
I'm strong okay!
So should i ignore you after this?

Mission

Salam.
Nervous tak kalau kena masak banyak-banyak
untuk nak jual kat orang ramai?
Of  course la nervous.
Masak nasi kerabu tu pernah la buat dua tiga kali kat sini.
Tapi kalau nak jual untuk satu lokaliti,
hati tiba2 bermonolog 'boleh ke aku jual ni? laku ke tak ni'

Nak2 pulak kena buat solok lada
yang sepanjang hidup dah dekat dua dekad ni
tak pernah nak amek tahu cara nak buat solok tu
unless la dah nampak ada benda tu atas meja and tinggal makan je.

Bila dah testing2 buat aritu,
not bad la untuk first timer macam aku ni
banyak lagi kena belajar
nak buat tu pon banyak kali gle call mak and nenek tanya resepi.

Then semalam bila jual,
rasa berbaur kat dalam liver,
macam mana la rasa benda ni nanti bila diorang rasa nanti
-___-

Lagi satu, bestnya kawan-kawan kat sini.
I like it when you girls still willing to help me
even takde lansung bahagian untung tu masuk poket kita semua.
kira macam buat keje amal la ni.
Terima kasih sbb sanggup bersama-sama
memenatkan diri with me and my roomate.
Jasamu dikenang ^_^



note 1: it's December guys..need to start studying really2 hard.

note 2: ada orang tanya dalam nasi kerabu ada ikan bilis x? kalau ada jangan bubuh and i laughed really hard for that...sorry a lot ya.